I recently bought him the blankey/bear toy thing - you know, the bear head and blanket attached? When I was pregnant, I thought "Who the hell would buy this for their kid?", but was reassured by my friend Alison who has it for her daughter. Lo and behold, he has taken to this toy like no other! He smiles whenever he sees it, and I've realized that it's been next to him both times he's fallen asleep! I'm guessing this is his security blanket now, so I'll have to make sure to bring it everywhere we go now (which is mostly just my mom's house)
I refuse to let MIL babysit because it's just an accident waiting to happen. Not to mention our relationship isn't the best. Maybe when he's older and can walk and eat on his own and will be able to tell her "No I don't want this!" or will be able to tell me "Grandma gave me this!", I'll feel a little better.
The only reason I actually even leave LO with my mom is that I know I can yell at her and tell her I want things done my way, I can't be so sure with MIL because she has the tendency to do things her own way, regardless.
I don't know why I'm sitting and posting right now, if LO is sleeping I could be doing something productive like, cleaning. Ugh, I loathe it. Can't it clean itself by now? H has left the house as I kind of kicked him out and then tried to make him feel bad about it, but whatever, it's his loss. He acts like he's punishing me, he's only punishing himself; he doesn't see LO that much as it is, he could have at least hung out with him so I could get something done, but whatever, it's just another sign for me that I should be able to do things for myself and not expect stuff from him. I'm not too upset, I'm so used to being alone it's scary, I can't really deal with him in my face all day, although ideally, I'd love to.
...More later, off to clean the bathroom.
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